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Thursday, April 26, 2012

Sarah Silverman "The Next Milk" (A brand new episode of GREATEST SPEECHES EVER starring Sarah Silverman), and also, a list of the lesser known presidential candidates

The Rock driving meme
"Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?"
 (created by some unknown genius)

Yup, you guessed it. It's time for another exciting episode of GREATEST SPEECHES EVER...

starring Sarah Silverman

Sarah Silverman and the cast of the Sarah Silverman Program

and the title of this GREAT SPEECH is "The New Milk" from an episode from the second season of the Sarah Silverman Program called "Joan of Arf."  To make a long story short, basically Sarah is on trial for bestiality, and needs to give the greatest speech of her life, or she'll be going off to the big house for a very long time...

"I'm not a monster, I'm just a curious Albert Einstein, or Sigmund Freud, or Charles Woolery...

Ladies and gentleman, I appeal to you to think of the first man to ever drink milk from the teat of a cow. I bet he got a lot of flack too. But look at him now... he's a genius, isn't he? Now I didn't drink from my dog's anus,...but who's to say that I couldn't have found the next milk. The next milk could have been in my dog's anus! It turns out it wasn't. If there's an opposite of milk though, I think I may have found that. I challenge you...each and every one of you to go out there, and find the next milk. Whether it be in a cat's ear, or a dolphin's blowhole, or a monster's nose. But if you think it's wrong...if you think the curious should be condemned...well, I'm afraid we'll never find the next milk. And that's sad. I'm done. I'm finished." - Sarah Silverman 

and now for something completely different...


I know it's hard to believe, but Abraham Fungus Jr. isn't the only person running for president of the United States of America today. You do have some other options if you are a registered for voting American citizen person. So, without further ado, here are some of the lesser known candidates for the presidency of the United States of America...

Lobsterman of the Crustacian Liberation Political Party

Well, I'm not completely sure that Lobsterman is running again this time around, and I had no idea how to contact Lobsterman to ask him this.  Honestly, he looks kind of intimidating, so ok..I was afraid to ask him.  Alright.  I was too scared to ask him.  Ok, are you happy now?


Once again, we are in danger of being forced to make a choice between 2 candidates, who if elected, are going to do pretty much the same darn things.    The major political parties laugh at us, the average citizen, "HAHAHA", as they abuse their power to enrich themselves.  How much longer will we sit on our rusty dusties and put up with this?


Then there is the classic choice "none of the above."  If a candidate legally changes their name to "none of the above" or "nobody" they might actually win.

Vermin Supreme for President of the United States via

And then there's this dude...

Part of Vermin Supreme's platform is "zombie preparedness" which shows he at least has enough brains to anticipate our next candidate...

Zombie Nixon for president via

Let's face it, as disastrously as the Nixon presidency ended with the Watergate scandal, "Tricky Dick" still looks like a genius compared to some of the leaders we currently have in charge of our nation.  So why not find a way to re-animate his corpse, and put Richard Nixon back in the White House?  The Constitution of the United States doesn't specifically prohibit zombie presidencies, so I think this could actually work.


And that leads us to our song of the day...

Russian Doll Situation

After our list of lesser known presidential candidates, I thought it would be fitting to give a chance to a lesser known band called Russian Doll situation with a lesser known song... Yes someone, actually made a song called "Zombie Nixon." Cool, huh?  SEE: ZOMBIE NIXON by Russian Doll Situation

Richard Nixon "WIN."

Welpers...that ends yet another intersting, and life enriching post at Funguzz Vizzion aka .  Once again, God bless you, and thank you for your support.


  1. naaa, I prefer Abraham Fungus Jr. for president! I think he's got the right stuff! But maybe Vermin Supreme as vice president! or Nobody. Nobody is the coolest person ever!

  2. Zit pus is the next milk, but you'd to be an insect to enjoy it. As for Sarah Silverman, isn't she more sexy than funny? Would you rather bone her or have your funny bone tickled by her? That's the question I want answered.

    1. Sarah Silverman is very beautiful. But I think if we were ever boyfriend and girlfriend, she would make fun of me so mercilessly, I would probably start crying.

  3. I would totally vote for Robo-Nixon but not for Zombie Nixon. That speech was epically epic too. I'm glad you posted it in wordy form because I couldn't see the video.

    1. It took me over an hour to transcribe it onto parchment paper. I had nothing to work with, but my eyes and ears, and a felt-tipped marker I got at Walmart.

  4. Great post, keep up this awesome work!

  5. Um, who is Sarah Silverman again??? LOL

    Vermin's got my vote!!!!!!! If zombies come I want him around to save the country!!! All these crazy zombie movies and shows have me FREAKED out. With 2012 here I think that Vermin would be best for the job. Besides, I love saying his name. Vermin. :) (LMAO Rat and Diana Ross?? What?! The most supreme Vermin there is...I'm still laughing...)

    P.S. What is with the boot on his head?!

    1. Well, I would say Sarah Silverman is now most famous for "The Sarah Silverman Program"...but I guess I already mentioned that. I have written some very informative articles on her The Sarah Silverman Program (Part 1), The Sarah Silverman Program (Part 2) Good question about Vermin Supreme. Maybe I should write a blog about that, and corner the market on people who google "What is with the boot on Vermin Supreme's head?!"

    2. Please do!! I'm dyeing to know about the boot!! If it's a good enough reason, maybe I'll start wearing one too. I have a few boots that need to be recycled...

  6. Nice videos!
    Great blog.

  7. You - yes, YOU - get my vote, if it ever really mattered anyway.

  8. I used to be fan of Sarah Silverman's until I got tired of her wee voice. Oh, and she did this one bit in which she licked the mirror. I do not like to look at a person's tongue, unless it's going in my mouth. Too much?
    Back in the Myspace days, I was talking to Nobody. He's a huge jerk. Rumor has it that it was Trent Reznor. HUGE jerk.




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