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Friday, June 29, 2012

Boxxy's New Video "Oh Swoon" (wellll, Catie Wayne's new video ACTUALLY, but you know what I mean), ALSO...My Favorite Hayley Williams and/or Paramore Video, the Topic of Forever Alone-liness, and How to Win the Girl of Your Dreams (as if I would know anything about that)

Chuck Brown by Tim O'brien
Welcome back, kids.  The prospect of writing this blog article has been looming over my head for some time, as it is quite a daunting task.  For I am going to take on some of the most important, burning issues of our time... such as modern day so-called "romantic" love, the topic of loneliness and how to deal with it in a dignified manner,  how to go about searching for, and finding one's soul mate, etc., and so forth...on and on and on....

So, I was about to take on the enormity of the task of confronting, and writing about these earth shaking issues, when as fate would have of the greatest and most heroic figures of all the internets,  Boxxy aka Catie Wayne, made a video that touched on some of the things which I wanted to talk about.

Boxxy (aka Catie Wayne) in her new video "Oh, Swoon" via

Well, this new "Boxxy" video is on her youtube channel "anewhopeee" (with 3 e's), so it is more a Catie Wayne video, than a Boxxy video.  But as Lord Throckmorton Fungusleaves would say, "That is neither here, nor there."  Anywho, enough of my mindless chuntering, here's the video:

In this new video Boxxy or Catie is "hit on" by a pick up artist, and Catie wonders aloud why any female would fall for such brazenly obscene over confidence, or succumb to such obnoxious tactics.  But as women obviously do everyday, Catie expresses how perplexed she is by this...

But these "players" throw the whole romantic eco-system out of whack,  as too many members of Catie's gender mistake the desire of these douche nozzles to get into their pants, for actual interest in them as a person.  This leads to heartbreak for both the women, and for the guy's in their life who actually do care about them as a person, but got out maneuvered by some overly aggressive, smooth talking bozo.

I know they say, all's fair in love and war...  but just wanting someone to use them, or prove you can get them, is not love.  For at least a generation now, the corporate media has fed us this mentality, that "greed is good", "look out for number one"...just see what you want and TAKE IT!...We've been sold the philosophy that we are not all on the same team working towards a common goal...there are "winners" and "losers" in life, and if you happen to be a "loser", well HAHAHAHA, sucks to be you!  It is the prevalence of this boorish mentality, which has led many to believe that no one truly cares about each other, there is no such thing as love...and that's just the way it is.

Or is it?

"The Only Exception" Paramore and Hayley Williams

My favorite Hayley Williams and/or Paramore song of all time, is "The Only Exception" because I don't think there is really another song in existence that deals with the exact subject matter that this song does...or at least deals with it so effectively.

In this video, because of different experiences in her life, Hayley Williams loses her faith in "love."

"Love is giving someone the power to hurt you terribly."  (creator Matt Ian)

She is resigned to being alone if necessary, rather than submit herself to what seems like the inevitable heartache that comes in a world where "love does not exist."

Hayley Williams in a scene from "The Only Exception"

At a climactic point in the video, Hayley finally realizes she somehow has managed to find the one nice guy who is possibly "the only exception", the one who really loves her, and will stick by her side no matter what.  So Hayley runs through the different rooms (which symbolize the different parts of her life who made her who she is) in a way that's reminiscent of the way Adrian ran into Rocky Balboa's arms, at the end of "Rocky."

Charlie Brown by Charles M. Schulz

This video is also uplifting, because the guy was able to win Hayley's heart for all the right reasons.  Her character in the video was able to see through the fog of all the heartbreak and misfortune she had experienced in life, to the realization that here was a good person that really loved her for who she was, and would always be there for her.  And luckily, she realizes this before it's too late and she throws it all away...

But this kind of thing only happens in Hayley Williams' music videos.  In, real life, nice guys finish last.

"what happened to liking guys for their personalities" ~ (by an unknown genius)

But there is a glimmer of hope if you are one of these "nice guys."  The latest scientific research shows there has been a recent paradigm shift that may be in your favor.  SEE  'Alpha Males' Less Interesting To Women During Recession, Study Suggests or also read,  Nerds & Nerdettes where Jax of http://raviolisandwaterworks  declares "Nerds are in!"  I don't know if I really buy the explanation of the first article, that the recession has to do with women's taste in men suddenly shifting.  If anything, perhaps tough economic times has made us all become less superficial, and focus on what's really important in life.  Well, whatever the reason, if it's true it may be a positive development for "nice guys",  but also for the progress of the human species in general.

But make no mistake about it.  For most of us, finding our soul mate in life is an utterly gargantuan task.  In other words...finding someone who loves us for who we are, and will reciprocate the love and affection that we feel for them...  In regards to finding that person, we may ask ourselves,..."IS SUCH A THING EVEN POSSIBLE?"


Let's hope that such a thing IS possible.  Though honesty compels me to report, it doesn't seem to happen very often.  Oliver Wendell Homes said,  Most of us go to our grave with our music still inside us."  This reality is a hard pill to swallow.  It would be nice if at some point, some powerful force would pick us up, and shake us out of our doldrums...

"Most of the problems in life..." created by an unknown genius

However, with no guarantee this will happen.  How do we TAKE ACTION?   How do we transform the hero we can envision ourselves to be in our imaginations...into a hero of actuality.

"pretending to be a hero" ~ (created by an unknown genius)

Luckily, I have done a great deal of research, and have developed a comprehensive strategy to deal with these problems...

STEP 1:  Assemble a panel of experts to do some brainstorming.

"NO ONE can rustle the triumverate" Bill Nye version

STEP 2:  Give up on assembling a panel of experts, for they have better things to do apparently.

STEP 3:  Well...I did find some good advice on the internets about this subject I am writing about to you today.

One of these bits of advice, did involve a step by step process, by which one of us poor lonely slobs, could win the girl of our dreams.  It begins with common sense proclamations like (now, i'm paraphrasing) "get out of the house", "go to where the girls are", "stop being afraid of failure", "stop making excuses", "stop being so sad, and cheer the f--- up!"...

Invader Zim:  "I'm sad because..."  ~ created by madcat124 @ deviantART

The step by step process devised by this unknown helper of the sad, broken hearted, and lonely, involves the romantic tactic of finding a female that seems somewhat receptive, and then spending a Gorillion dollars, on a ginormous gift for her.

"girl advice" ~ (creator unknown)

It seems like a pretty good idea (not that I know what the hell I am talking about), but I can't very well use this idea now that I'm writing about it (that would be tacky).  Besides, I have tried it before (sort of), and the gift ended up getting stolen.  I can't very well keep buying Gorillion dollar gifts, or I will go bankrupt...

Which leads me to my next, bit of advice...

"Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills." ~ Napoleon Dynamite (tumbling around tumblr)

These words of wisdom come from an unlikely source, but they are OH SO TRUE.  "Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills," Napoleon Dynamite.  In other words, find what you are good at, and become the absolute best at it.  Then when you have "great skills", perhaps then you will also have a great self image...and then perhaps, you will also have a great job, and a great career.  Then when you have all of these things, you can win the girl of your dreams, and buy her as many expensive gifts as you want!  Not that we should want people to like us for superficial reasons, but attaining confidence in ourselves, and self-respect, are the first steps in becoming the person we should be.  Then when we become the person we should be, we will have have "the skills" to find the person we are meant to be with.  Get "great skills", and all follows from that.

Well, we could stop this tale here... a perfect place to stop the show...but NO...we press further.

Acquiring "skills" is not easy...and neither is finding our soul mate.  So, there are many cold, hard days we will be tempted to give up.  But we must do our darndest not to give in to this temptation.  See the video below...

In this famous boxing scene from the movie "Cool Hand Luke", we see the indomitable spirit of Luke, played by actor Paul Newman.  Luke gets beaten badly, but he wins the respect of the other prisoners because of his refusal to give up.  We may not in this life, win the respect of the world, but perhaps if we do not give up, we will win the respect of the people who matter.

"Why won't you stay down?" gif  (created by Zac Gorman)

It may seem unfair, that it is necessary for some of us to engage in such a titanic struggle to find someone who will love us unconditionally...

"Child and Cactus" ~ (created by an unknown genius)

...but perhaps, that is the only time when we really appreciate what we have found.

Bob Marley quote

Here in the closing scene of the original "Rocky",  Rocky loses the big fight, but wins Adrian's heart...and isn't that what it's all about?

Once again,

God bless you all,...  and please remember to support your local zoo.

"Jimmy the cat" (found on the internets)

Stay classy, Chicago.


  1. The evidence on this issue on conflicting. For example, I've heard that women who go to sperm banks favour the sperm of nice guys rather than macho show-offs. So nice guys can put their jacking off to good use. But unconditional love is a myth, no woman will love a man who eats his own boogers or has genital warts. Romantic love is always conditional.

    1. Well, I don't have genital warts. And I think I can stop eating boogers whenever I put my mind to it. So, perhaps there is still hope for me.

  2. I'm quite puzzled when it comes to the L-word. I mean, with all the bullying and the-whole-school-hates-me, I should me quite hateful as well, right?
    but it doesn't happen.
    I still keep trying and failing.
    I don't want to, but I do.

    1. As Dylan said, "...there's no success like failure... and failure's no success at all." I believe every so-called "failure" is a learning experience ultimately on the way to success.

  3. If I can't love and accept myself unconditionally, I sure as hell don't expect someone else to do it. At the moment, I am working on my career, spending hours in prayer (there is thirty seconds in an hour, right?) asking the Universe to help my sister straighten out so that I can move to England, like I was supposed to this summer, and other stuff that takes up my entire day. I don't exactly have time for love. It doesn't help that I don't date American. Do you know how hard it is to find a Scottish man here? Very.
    Not only do nice guys finish last, so do nice women. I can't count the times I have been rejected because I don't drink, don't do drugs, and don't put out. It's tough out there. Oh, and you used a picture of Charlie brown. I fear that will happen to me. I suppose, in the end, Charles Schulz came out the winner. His own little redhead rejected him, but he still got his happy ending.

    1. Well said, Nellie Vaughn. Very well said. As perhaps you can see, I squeezed every last drop of blood from the turnip that is my brain to put this post together, and it is encouraging to be getting such thoughtful feedback from everyone so far. Perhaps somewhere out there in the multi-verse Charlie Brown will win the heart of the little red haired girl, and perhaps somehow, some way, you will find your "Scottish man." As the host of "All thing Scottish" used to say, "If it's not Scottish it's crap!!!"

  4. Yeah woman do tend to go for the asshole guys who treat them like shit, don't know why though! But what I learnt is: Be the Asshole guy girls want! Many girls love a show of force! Many girls love it when a man becomes their confedence for them! Be that for them!
    But then agian I remember when I worked at this one place, this girl I worked with told me about how she aproached a guy on the bus and blatently asked him out and gave him her number! So sometimes the roles reverse! Yay!
    But you also stated that girls are more into looks now. I don't think thats true. I knew many nice guys in high school (back in the 1990's) that struck out with girls cause they didn't look cool enough! I know TV often shows that in the 1990's girls went for nice guys but its not true. Sure there is the exeption to the rules, but for the most part: no. Nice guys have always been shit out of luck. Even nice fun guys like myself (you've seen my videos, you see that I can be a fun guy!) but no, I struck out and failed with girls constantly through out my life! Didn't even go for the 7's or 8's, just stuck to the bland 4's or 5's!... cause I love personalitly more then looks. But that didn't change anything. Even bland girls want more then bland guys (like myself!).
    But of course my story has a great ending! I found a woman that was okay with a guy like me! A woman 20 years older then me! I've been with her (my first and only girlfriend) since I was 21 and she was 41! Over eight years we've been together and its great!
    So my advice to guys trying to get a girl is: I have no advice.
    Oh exept the: treat them like shit advice.

    The road is long, and the road is hard, but in the end the only thing to do is go down that road.

    Good luck to all the guys out there looking for love!

    1. I think you misunderstood me..I don't think I said women are "more into looks now." But whatever, that's not important...I get the gist of your comment. I'm glad your story has a happy ending. It kinda depresses me though, what you say about the chicks not digging you despite you being such a "fun guy." You are a fun guy, Bersercules. I don't understand why they would not see that. Geez, that's depressing. But on the other hand, there are billions of women on the planet, so in theory, there could be someone out there for every man...perhaps she lives in Burkina Faso, or Antarctica,..or even beneath the crust of the Earth (who knows)...but she MIGHT possibly be out there..somewhere.

    2. Oh I think you were referencing this "what happened to liking guys for their personalities", on the subject of looks. I can't take credit for that at all, as it was created by some unknown genius on the internets. However, I remember the 90's quite well. It was not a very pleasant time for me either. Nope. Not a fan of the 90's.

    3. What are your experiences with women? Are you an agressive guy or a passive guy? Girls not liking guys who are fun and only going for jerks is common where I live, whats it like for you?

      Gosh I hope the woman who's right for some nice guy isn't living in the center of the world! I'd feel bad for that guy! (now I'm worried for Mark the Rambling Person!)

      Yeah I was referencing the "what happened to liking guys for their personalities" picture, I knew you didn't make it, but I assumed you added it cause it represented your sentiments on the subject.

      The 90's were lame. I'd shot them and put them out of their misery like Old Yeller, but they're already gone.

    4. Bersercules, I have been more of a "sit back and wait for a miracle to occur" kinda guy, and not a "go out and make things happen" type of dude. And I think your experiences are pretty universal for the most part. Actually, I do identify with that picture/artwork and what it says. I was afraid I would make myself look like kind of a dweeb by posting it...but, oh well! like that really matters at this point!

    5. I think its safe to say that 90% of guys with blogs are dweebs. We're all dweebs together! Heck if we weren't dweebs wouldn't we spend most of our time hitting on girls in bars and getting laid?

      I hope your miracle occurs! And a beautiful subteranian Mole-People Princess accends into your home and falls head over heals in love with you!

    6. Sounds like the plot of one of the movies you review, Bersercules.

  5. wow that artist sure got Charlie Brown's sad self-respect down.

  6. The title was almost as long as the post :)

  7. Okay there's quite a lot of stuff here so I'm going to do my best to comment on this properly. I myself am what is considered a "hopeless romantic" but I still haven't quite given up on the hope of finding someone who will love me unconditionally. The first step to finding that though is really to love yourself unconditionally. When you do that, other people will love you. There will always be an exception.

    1. Everyone is giving such thoughtful insights in their comments. I really appreciate the input, and hopefully the gentle readers out there in the peanut galleries of the internets do as well.

  8. Is such a thing even possible? Aliens, dude. ALIENS.

    And, personally, I tend to go for scrawny nerdy guys. "Alpha male" is quite the turn-off for me. --.--

    -Barb the French Bean

  9. See, the thing about "nice" guys is that most of the time, they're not all that nice. It's like a facade of niceness that they try and use in hopes of getting something in return. had a really good article about it a few weeks back.

  10. I think she captured the essence of creepy, "just want to be friends" men. I mean...I couldn't have done it better myself!!!! And she's right, those lines do work on some girls. For the love of God... lol

    1. I think the "just want to be friends" line, is an excuse to add the girl to their roledex of female phone numbers. I suppose it is a good strategy statistically. Say you get about 10,000 phone numbers in your roledex, at least one of them is bound to take your call!

  11. I agree with part of this and disagree with part of it. I don't think nice guys always finish last. I married a fantastic, nice, kind hearted man. However I had to marry a dirt bag first before I realized what I really needed and wanted. Sometimes age and maturity are key factors. I do agree that one should never give up. It's totally worth it once you have found your one and only. I was with the first husband 16 years before I left.

  12. There is a lot going on in your post. I enjoyed the new Boxxxy video.




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