Saturday, August 11, 2012

Mitt Romney Choo Choo Chooses Paul Ryan to be his Running Mate (Independent Presidential candidate Abraham Fungus Jr. is not impressed)

that post gave Spiderman cancer
I know not that many people love to read my political posts...but come's not going to be that bad.  Besides there is some pretty big news today, and I would be journalistically remiss if I didn't mention it.  It seems Mitt Romney has finally chosen his running mate, and it has shaken up the political world.  Being the investigative reporter that I am, I am going to report on it even though almost no one reads my political stories, unless I include a picture of ancient aliens expert Giorgio Tsoukalos.  And the even worse news is, I am all out of pictures of Giorgio Tsoukalos.

here is a pic of Bad Luck Brian, since I am all out of pics of Giorgio Tsoukalos

So Mitt Romney chooses Wisconsin congressman Paul Ryan, a favorite of the Tea Party to be his running mate, and here is my quick analysis:  It seems like the Romney team is employing the old Karl Rove strategy of firing up the base to win an election.  If Romney was holding out any hope of winning this election with the moderates, or the people on the fences that could go either way, he would have picked someone drab and inoffensive like Tim Pawlenty.  Or he would have picked a woman, or an African Amercan, or at least someone who wasn't a white dude exactly like himself.  Romney seems to be writing off the middle.  He is expecting a close election, and he is hoping to win it by firing up the true believers.   (Pssst by the way..  read my article Hot Problems 2 "Like a Princess": the Double Take girls make a new music video AND decide to run for president; ALSO Mitt Romney's running mate (our first ever episode of "who is it?" in the history of this website) to see a list of choices for Romney's vp that would have been a lot better than Paul Ryan.)

Mitt Romney, Paul Ryan, and Unimpressed McKayla Maroney

Enough of what I think...what does endorsed Independent presidential candidate Abraham Fungus Jr. think of all this.  Just check out the video below to find out...

Orson Welles' hand clapping gif

Orson Welles seems to be impressed with Abraham Fungus Jr.s statement...

If Romney's strategy backfires, President Obama will be doing some applauding of his own.

President Obama clapping gif

Well, dear friends, that's all I have for you today.  Once again thank you and please remember to support your local zoo.
Stay classy, Chicago.


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