Wednesday, January 9, 2013

THE WEEK'S MOST RIVETING NEWS STORIES SO FAR (Some of the Issues Discussed: 1. the Justin Bieber mauie wowie smoking saga, 2. Alex Jones and Piers Morgan, and 3. James Franco and Ashley Benson's parody video)

As the legendary Cubs' first baseman Leon Durham used to say, "Let's play 3!"  Yes, kids, in today's entry we will be discussing 3 of the most important news stories of the week...and then a little later on, we will be dealing with some related business as hold on to your potatoes, because this is going to be a lengthy post.  You see, I haven't written anything for awhile, and now I've got a lot to say.  But, I am sure my efforts will pay off as I bet there is someone out there on the internets who will find this article, and consider it to be quite life enriching. 

I think I will just get on with our story here in chronological order.  Yes, I think that would be best.

what Justin Bieber might look like in 10 years if he starts smoking weed

Yessums, this week we heard more of the accusations about Justin Bieber possibly turning to marijuana to deal with some of the stress he has been suffering from lately.  Welp, if you didn't hear about it, don't worry, because my roving entertainment reporter the honorable Lord Throckmorton Fungusleaves made a video about the whole crazy situation, which you can easily view below...

Well, what else do I need to say about that.  I think the video pretty much covers it all.

Moving right along...

Piers Morgan, Alex Jones, and a giant, vicious cat discuss gun control

The other huge story that was making a commotion all across the internets this week, was Alex Jones' big blow up during his appearance on Piers Morgan's show, where he was supposedly there to be debating the gun control issue.  If you want to see the whole "interview" in it's entirety you can watch it here ALEX JONES VS. PIERS MORGAN

Superman and Wonder Woman trying to clear Metropolis of Plant Creatures (via

I can tell you right now that clearing the nation of dangerous and deadly assault weapons will be much more difficult than clearing Metropolis of deadly plant creatures.

the "you sicken me" rabbit (found on the internets)

Anywho,  you could tell that both Alex Jones and Piers Morgan were pretty much nauseated by each other.  Evidently, Morgan's strategy was to coax Alex Jones into coming on his show so that Jones could exploooode and show America what a nutjob he was.  Ironically, both sides have some valid points to make.  The left is correct about the need for a wiser, common sense approach to gun control.  And the right has an argument to be made in regards to our pop culture being permeated with violent, and destructive imagery and entertainment.  Even Alex Jones puts his finger on an important issue, which is giant corporations feeding the American people dangerous chemicals and drugs (that may increase the likelihood of violent behavior) just to make a huge profit.  But nothing is ever going to get done to solve any of this, because both sides will just keep bickering back and forth, and will never admit that their opponent has anything good to say about anything.  Until those attitudes change, no progress will ever be made.  And THAT sickens ME. 

O.K.  You could file this next news story under W for "WHO THE HELL CARES?"

Peter Griffin of Family Guy "WHO THE HELL CARES?" meme

But I guess, to be 100% Oprah honest with all of you,  I do care, because I am writing about it, aren't I?

James Franco and Ashley Benson in their parody video of Justin Bieber's "Boyfriend"

This new parody video made by actor James Franco (which also stars the lovely Ashley Benson) is starting to make the buzzes of something resembling a "big deal" all around the various tubes of the internets.  People are really not sure what to make of it.  Some people say they (Franco and Benson) were trying to show support for their friend Selena Gomez by making fun of her ex-boyfriend (who is of course the Biebs).  Yes, well some people have been saying that. But if Ashley Benson is supposed to be playing the role of Selena in this parody...well, the Selena Gomez character is not exactly portrayed very respectfully either.  So was the intention to be ridiculing both Bieber and Gomez?  Perhaps Franco and Benson don't like either one of them?  Maybe they were both just gooped up on gop, and decided to make this stupid video.  Ahhhhh!!  WHO THE HELL CARES??

But anyway, I am posting the James Franco parody vid right here for your personal edification.

While I have been pretending to not care about any of this (probably just to look cool), I did care enough to ask's resident comedian (and diehard Belieber) Chucky C. Chuckles to make a video telling us everything he thought about it, and welpers, that vid is also posted for you.  So here it is...

"I WAS SUPPOSED TO PICK UP CARL" (possibly Nellie Vaughn's favorite meme of all time)

And I promised you some related news, so here it is.  Nellie Vaughn who is the author of Buttons are Not Currency, ("Nellie", btw,  also hosted the "Little Room Discussions" podcast with this other girl)  has returned from exile, and written a blog to inform us that she is moving to Portland.  Yes, it all sounds like the plot to a Renee Zellweger movie, but I assure you it's the truth.  If you don't believe me, just read this Remember That One Time I Said Portland Was Awful?.  Whenever a fellow blogger like Jax or Bersercules (or any of you, you all know who you are) must be on their way, I kind of look like Carl does in that meme.  So hopefully Nellie is back to stay.

a Gary Numan and Tubeway Army photo montage I created for some reason

Uggg.  I don't really know how to end this crazy post, so let's just play ourselves out with a song which will be "Are Friends Electric" by Gary Numan and Tubeway Army, and call it a night...

Once again, thank you, and please remember to support your local zoo.

Stay classy, Chicago!


My Personal Twitter Feed! (so exciting)